sorry for my unexpected break and I’m only apologizing to the one person who really motivated me to even remember I had a blog. I have really been thinking lately even more deeply then I was before I’ve been taking influences by more and more people. I even had my brain open to strangers friends even random Internet advice seems I had hit a new low but I do feeling greatly enlightened. This was basically my way of informing you that I will be rambling on for a while or maybe somewhere in the middle ill wrap it up and have something to write about tomorrow. By the way happy birthday Krissy even tho it’s tomorrow I wanted to be first to say it since you are an avid reader 🙂 now back to me I have genuinely changed my way of thinking it wasn’t that it wasn’t working it was more I wasn’t working. See every year I can say things have gradually gotten better compared to last year but by the end of every year with all the bumps and bruises I have receive the sound of a new start is always going to make me think it can’t be as worst as last year. Friends I held dear I will have to do without and the family I never had I can’t wish for anymore because I will be reminded every Christmas that maybe I wasn’t good enough to get my wish this year and to jus try again in the new year. Sorry I can’t my new mental is just be SoFkknAmazing it sounds so conceited when people ask what makes me so amazing and I reply me. I am so serious when I say it tho I aim to be that guy I have so much ambition that I just can’t wait to help everyone else I’m just going to do what I have to do to help me and anyone who wants to get involved with me. I hate liars people who are just full of empty promises and all those who dismiss instead of address. All I got is a dollar and a dream now watch me begin to dream chase and since they say I can rest when I’m dead guess I just won’t stop running. At the end of the day nothing in life is free but when you just sit and breath and think the thought you had with your free will I wonder how much that cost you. To get to certain places in life people are ready to sell their soul or just drop all their goals or keep living day by day until they grow old. Not I I will not tell a lie I plan to rise straight to the sky live up there until I die and got back high. I don’t need empathy nor sympathy I would love to surround myself with people who don’t sidetrack but interact not leaving you in the dark instead of shedding some light people who don’t care about what happen back then people who don’t have to try to be your friend. I have held so much in before slowly but surely letting it but some scars will never heal even with all the time in the world just because I care. you know nothing can heal if you pick at the scabs well they can you would just be stupid enough to pick at it again to unleash everything. Sorry to everyone who could never come to grips with who I am because they weren’t really aiming at me they were aiming at who I could be or thought I could be and thank you for those who are here who actually keep me in there prayers and actually miss me when I’m not there. Elephants aren’t able to cry but they never forget so if they can’t forget all they endured and never shed a tear what right do I have. Well thanks for listening while I vented don’t forget to comment or something if you can take the time out your day or night to read I be more then happy to reply at anytime.
– P.S. I do suck at replying bare with me your never forgotten – SoFkknAmazing